PIGSKIN
FOOTBALL SUNDAY
Week Seventeen
RESULTS
Week Fourteen
OFF WEEK (15)
Week Sixteen
WEEK SEVENTEEN:
Friday Line ~ NYDN
PATRIOTS -15 (Jets)
It's a good thing Todd Bowles already has a contract extension in hand because this is gonna get ugly. Belichick wants home field advantage. The Patriots do not give away late season games, much less at home. They play to the finish.
WIN 26-6 Patriots
D.C. Hogs -3 (GIANTS)
Motivation is subjective. The Hogs want to finish the season with an 8-8 record, right? Thanks to the schedule makers, they couldn't have drawn a more downtrodden opponent than the Giants. New general manager David Gettlman will be watching very closely. A number of Giants can potentially play themselves out of town based on Sunday's performance alone.
Loss 18-10 Giants
RAVENS -9 1/2 (Bengals)
The Bengals might love and respect their head coach, but they don't win for him. The Cincy front office would be doing Marvin Lewis a huge favor by firing him. His success is waiting for him elsewhere. The Ravens would love to end the season with ten victories. It just looks better in the morning papers.
Loss 31-27 Bengals
Packers +6 1/2 (LIONS)
Big game losers! The Lions blew their shot at making the playoffs last week against the Bengals. The Packers in turn may have their way against a deflated pride of cats and thus avoid a losing season for their stockholders back home. Green Bay's coaching staff is in the spotlight.
Loss 35-11 Lions
Bills -2 1/2 (DOLPHINS)
The Bills need a victory and a lot of cooperation from the Ravens, Titans, and Chargers. I do not trust the South Beach Sea Mammals, and by the looks of this spread, neither do Bills fans.
WIN 22-16 Bills
Panthers +3 1/2 (FALCONS)
Atlanta center Alex Mack may not play Sunday. Remember what happened to the Falcons after his injury in last year's Super Bowl against the Patriots? Atlanta lost their ability to run the ball, sustain offensive possession, and keep Tom Brady off the field. The masses enjoy saying the Falcons choked. But no one ever brings up the injury to Mack as the reason why.
Loss 22-10 Falcons
Saints -7 (BUCS)
Oh when the Saints, win the NFC South ... They're 3-3 on the road and have the inside track over Carolina.
Loss 31-24 Bucs
Jaguars + 3 1/2 (TITANS)
Titans are home and desperate for a win. They won their first game against the Jaguars, but I don't think they'll sweep the season series. Covering a close game is another story. Tom Coughlin may not be Jacksonville's head coach, but after last week's loss against the Niners, you can bet he's preaching about how to finish.
Loss 15-10 Titans
COLTS -4 (Texans)
Both teams have nothing to play for. Both head coaches could get fired (although in Houston's case that would be a mistake). The question now becomes which is the more despondent team?
WIN 22-13 Colts
STEELERS -10 1/2 (Browns)
The Browns have already locked up next year's number one draft pick. On Sunday they seek to add their names to the list of worst teams in NFL history. Go Browns!
Loss 28-24 Steelers
VIKINGS -12 (Bears)
The Bears are ready for hibernation. They'll pose little resistance against the Vikings.
WIN 23-10 Vikings
EAGLES +2 1/2 (Cowboys)
The Eagles defeated the Raiders last week, while the Cowboys fell to the Seahawks. Yet, the Cowboys are favored in Philadelphia? Are people souring on the Eagles? If I were them, I would want to finish the season strongly.
Loss 6-0 Cowboys
CHARGERS -7 (Raiders)
The Oakland/Los Angeles/Oakland/Las Vegas Raiders just wanna get this season over with. What's the over/under on Chargers fans showing up for the game? In any event, desperation rules the day. Chargers should take care of business - key word being, should.
WIN 30-10 Chargers
SEAHAWKS -9 (Cardinals)
Not sure if the Seahawks cover. But the Cardinals window of opportunity officially closes this week. They need to rebuild.
Loss 26-24 Cardinals
Chiefs +3 (BRONCOS)
After starting the season 5-0, the Chiefs lost six of seven. They've since won three straight and clinched the AFC West. Truth of the matter is the rest of the division sucked. Andy Reid knows he needs his bipolar team entering the playoffs on a winning note.
WIN 27-24 Chiefs
49ers -3 (RAMS)
Sudden league MVP favorite Jimmy Garoppolo is the savior of the universe. He's gonna throw four TD passes, and rack up 500 yards passing. Happy freakin New Year, Jimmy! You're the best.
WIN 34-14 Niners
Schmear of the Week:
Panthers +3 1/2
LOSS
Thank you for sticking around for another season of PIGSKIN. Good luck, and have a Happy Football Sunday, everyone!
Post Game:
Week Seventeen Record: 7-9
Overall Record: 93-113-6
Schmear of the Week: 8-8
Bagels in the Basket: -26
OFF WEEK (15)
Week Sixteen
Scoreboard:
Week Sixteen Record: 8-6-2
Overall Record: 86-104-6
Schmear of the Week: 8-7
Bagels in the Basket: -21
1st and Ten:
2nd and Short:
No Gain:
1st and Ten:
- NFC South Title > New Orleans Saints or Carolina Panthers (loser gains Wild Card).
2nd and Short:
- AFC > Baltimore seems a lock; if Tennessee wins they're in; both Los Angeles and Buffalo need a lot of help.
- NFC > New Orleans or Carolina will take one spot. Atlanta and Seattle are playing for the other. I predict an Atlanta loss, and a Seattle victory.
No Gain:
- With a loss, the Cleveland Browns would join the 2008 Detroit Lions as the only teams to post an 0-16 record in the sixteen game era.
PUNT!
- What's the over/under on head coach firings? Six?
WEEK SEVENTEEN:
Friday Line ~ NYDN
PATRIOTS -15 (Jets)
It's a good thing Todd Bowles already has a contract extension in hand because this is gonna get ugly. Belichick wants home field advantage. The Patriots do not give away late season games, much less at home. They play to the finish.
WIN 26-6 Patriots
D.C. Hogs -3 (GIANTS)
Motivation is subjective. The Hogs want to finish the season with an 8-8 record, right? Thanks to the schedule makers, they couldn't have drawn a more downtrodden opponent than the Giants. New general manager David Gettlman will be watching very closely. A number of Giants can potentially play themselves out of town based on Sunday's performance alone.
Loss 18-10 Giants
RAVENS -9 1/2 (Bengals)
The Bengals might love and respect their head coach, but they don't win for him. The Cincy front office would be doing Marvin Lewis a huge favor by firing him. His success is waiting for him elsewhere. The Ravens would love to end the season with ten victories. It just looks better in the morning papers.
Loss 31-27 Bengals
Packers +6 1/2 (LIONS)
Big game losers! The Lions blew their shot at making the playoffs last week against the Bengals. The Packers in turn may have their way against a deflated pride of cats and thus avoid a losing season for their stockholders back home. Green Bay's coaching staff is in the spotlight.
Loss 35-11 Lions
Bills -2 1/2 (DOLPHINS)
The Bills need a victory and a lot of cooperation from the Ravens, Titans, and Chargers. I do not trust the South Beach Sea Mammals, and by the looks of this spread, neither do Bills fans.
WIN 22-16 Bills
Panthers +3 1/2 (FALCONS)
Atlanta center Alex Mack may not play Sunday. Remember what happened to the Falcons after his injury in last year's Super Bowl against the Patriots? Atlanta lost their ability to run the ball, sustain offensive possession, and keep Tom Brady off the field. The masses enjoy saying the Falcons choked. But no one ever brings up the injury to Mack as the reason why.
Loss 22-10 Falcons
Saints -7 (BUCS)
Oh when the Saints, win the NFC South ... They're 3-3 on the road and have the inside track over Carolina.
Loss 31-24 Bucs
Jaguars + 3 1/2 (TITANS)
Titans are home and desperate for a win. They won their first game against the Jaguars, but I don't think they'll sweep the season series. Covering a close game is another story. Tom Coughlin may not be Jacksonville's head coach, but after last week's loss against the Niners, you can bet he's preaching about how to finish.
Loss 15-10 Titans
COLTS -4 (Texans)
Both teams have nothing to play for. Both head coaches could get fired (although in Houston's case that would be a mistake). The question now becomes which is the more despondent team?
WIN 22-13 Colts
STEELERS -10 1/2 (Browns)
The Browns have already locked up next year's number one draft pick. On Sunday they seek to add their names to the list of worst teams in NFL history. Go Browns!
Loss 28-24 Steelers
VIKINGS -12 (Bears)
The Bears are ready for hibernation. They'll pose little resistance against the Vikings.
WIN 23-10 Vikings
EAGLES +2 1/2 (Cowboys)
The Eagles defeated the Raiders last week, while the Cowboys fell to the Seahawks. Yet, the Cowboys are favored in Philadelphia? Are people souring on the Eagles? If I were them, I would want to finish the season strongly.
Loss 6-0 Cowboys
CHARGERS -7 (Raiders)
The Oakland/Los Angeles/Oakland/Las Vegas Raiders just wanna get this season over with. What's the over/under on Chargers fans showing up for the game? In any event, desperation rules the day. Chargers should take care of business - key word being, should.
WIN 30-10 Chargers
SEAHAWKS -9 (Cardinals)
Not sure if the Seahawks cover. But the Cardinals window of opportunity officially closes this week. They need to rebuild.
Loss 26-24 Cardinals
Chiefs +3 (BRONCOS)
After starting the season 5-0, the Chiefs lost six of seven. They've since won three straight and clinched the AFC West. Truth of the matter is the rest of the division sucked. Andy Reid knows he needs his bipolar team entering the playoffs on a winning note.
WIN 27-24 Chiefs
49ers -3 (RAMS)
Sudden league MVP favorite Jimmy Garoppolo is the savior of the universe. He's gonna throw four TD passes, and rack up 500 yards passing. Happy freakin New Year, Jimmy! You're the best.
WIN 34-14 Niners
Schmear of the Week:
Panthers +3 1/2
LOSS
Thank you for sticking around for another season of PIGSKIN. Good luck, and have a Happy Football Sunday, everyone!
Post Game:
Week Seventeen Record: 7-9
Overall Record: 93-113-6
Schmear of the Week: 8-8
Bagels in the Basket: -26
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