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Saturday, October 10, 2015

PIGSKIN 2015: Week Five



PIGSKIN


FOOTBALL SUNDAY
Week Five

RESULTS

Scoreboard:
Week Four Record:  7-4-1
Overall Record:  34-19-1
Schmear of the Week:  3-1
Bagels in the Basket:  +20

1st and Ten:
  • Green Bay, Atlanta, Denver, Cincinnati, and New England, all put their undefeated records on the line.  Carolina, the lone remaining undefeated team has a bye.
  • Miami was the first team to fire their coach this season.  My Spidey sense tells me the Houston Texans' Bill O'Brien could be (and perhaps should be) next, if they continue along their present course.

2nd and Short:
  • There are only 9 NFL teams playing above the .500 mark.  Par and below need not apply.
  • This is Atlanta's big chance to get a step ahead of the Panthers.  This is also the Giants big chance to grab hold of the division lead.
  • Here come the Seahawks.
  • The Cardinals will not lose 2 in a row.

No Gain:
  • The Jets can certainly use the time off, but they can't be happy about having their momentum stopped with a Week Five bye.
  • The famed Giants/49ers rivalry has seen better days.  The departure of Jim Harbaugh has left the Niners in disarray.
  • Once upon a time the Cowboys were 2-0.  The End.

Punt:
  • The Detroit Lions are the lone NFL team without a win.  They won't be getting their first victory this week either.  Meow!
  • See my Miami Dolphins inspired seafood menu below.

Week Five:
Friday Line ~ NYDN

GIANTS -7 (49ers)
It's hard to ignore the Giants performance over Buffalo last week.  Meanwhile, the 49ers are a floundering team with a floundering quarterback.  The Niners can't run, but the Giants were going to take that away regardless.  The Giants secondary will be loitering around for errant Kaepernick passes to come their way.  The defense will score and cover this game by themselves.
Loss; 30-27 Giants

BUCS -3 (Jaguars)
The Jaguars are finally back in Florida, but landed in the wrong city.  Two weeks of London fog, and a few days of Jag-lag is worth laying 3-points with the Bucs.  The Jaguars should have just stayed across the Pond.
WIN; 38-31 Bucs

Bills -2 1/2 (TITANS)
Rex is pissed after taking all those penalties, and getting trampled by the Giants last week.  Buffalo will clean that up.  Besides, this is the obligatory up week after a down week.  Otherwise, it's never about the Titans.
Loss; 14-13 Bills

Browns +7 (RAVENS)
These aren't the Ravens of old.  They had their last hurrah, and are going to start falling apart like wet toilet paper.  Cleveland will have opportunities to score and keep this game within range of victory.
WIN; 33-30 Browns  o.t.

FALCONS -7 (D.C. Hogs)
Did anyone see what the Falcons did to the Texans last week?  It's not like Houston lacks a pass rush. This week, the Hogs are gonna take a talon right in the eye.  Atlanta's flight will continue through Week Five.
Loss; 25-19 Falcons

CHIEFS -9 (Bears)
Travelling Bear bring remedy Chief need.  Get healthy.  Bear make Chief strong again.  Chief then make new rug for tee-pee.
Loss; 18-17 Bears

Saints +5 (EAGLES)
The Saints finally won at home last week, but I didn't like the way Brees looked throwing the ball.   However, the Eagles need to show me something, anything, before they get any respect from me.
Loss; 39-17 Eagles

Rams +9 1/2 (PACKERS)
The Rams continue being a hard safe to crack.  They defeated the high flying Cardinals last week, so the race in the NFC West is on.  I want to say they're on the verge of breaking through, but still have my reservations.  I think they'll at least cover in a somewhat high scoring game.
Loss; 24-10 Packers

Seahawks +3 (BENGALS)
This is it, the let down we've all been waiting for.  Remember how I've always said the Bengals do their worst work in big games at home?  Here we go...  Cincy's real problem is timing.  Seattle is emerging from their malaise.  If Marshawn Lynch were playing, I'd feel better.  If they have their heads on straight, the Bengals can actually pull this off.  However, Vegas doesn't seem overwhelmed with confidence either.
PUSH; 27-24 Bengals  o.t.

Cardinals -3 (LIONS)
Fugheddaboudit!  Right now, the Detroit Lions couldn't even stalk a box of Cheerios in COSTCO. Otherwise, last week's Cardinals loss to the Rams means nothing to me.  Keep on truckin' with the NFL's #1 offense.
WIN; 42-17 Cardinals

Patriots -8 1/2 (COWBOYS)
Let's forget about Tom Brady for a moment, and the multitude of touchdowns he's going to throw Sunday in the House that Jerry Built.  If Bill Belichick doesn't induce Dallas' Brandon Weeden into throwing at least 2 picks, I'll be very surprised.  Meanwhile, the Cowboys injuries keep mounting.   Who will it be this week?
WIN; 30-6 Patriots

Broncos -5 (RAIDERS)
The Broncos defense; The Black Hole; only one getting sucked in are the fans in Oakland.
WIN; 16-10 Broncos


Schmear of the Week:
Patriots -8 1/2
WIN

Guten Appetit

Walk By > Fresh mozzarella w/schmear of garlic butter and capers wrapped with prosciutto and roasted onto Ritz crackers.  Zucchini chips and fried calamari w/ marinara sauce.  Baked clams.  Stove grilled shrimp teriyaki on stix.

Sit Down > Tuna steaks; fried onion strips; roasted garlic red potatoes w/peppers and carrots; avocado tomato spinach salad in a lemon dressing.

What's on your football menu?

Good luck, and have a Happy Football Sunday everyone!

Post Game:
Week Five Record:  5-6-1
Overall Record:  39-25-2
Schmear of the Week:  4-1
Bagels in the Basket:  +21


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