PIGSKIN 2019: Week Nine

PIGSKIN

FOOTBALL SUNDAY

Week Nine

RESULTS

Week One

Week Two
Week Three

Week Four
Week Five
Week Six

Week Seven
Week Eight

SCOREBOARD:
Week Eight Record: 8-5
Overall Record: 54-52
Schmear of the Week: 4-4
Bagels in the Basket:  +2


LEADERS OF THE PACK

• A.F.C.  New England Patriots; Baltimore Ravens; Indianapolis Colts; Kansas City Chiefs; Buffalo Bills; Houston Texans.
• N.F.C.  Dallas Cowboys; Green Bay Packers; New Orleans Saints; San Francisco 49ers; Minnesota Vikings; Seattle Seahawks.

THE NATIONAL FUBAR LEAGUE

• Miami Dolphins; Cincinnati Bengals; New York Jets; Washington Snyders; Atlanta Falcons.

1st and Ten

• Patriots and Niners remain undefeated.
• Bill Belichick wins game #300.
• Bengals and Dolphins lead race for number one draft pick.

2nd and Long

• Jaguars troll Sam Darnold's ghostly experience.
• Jets trade DL Leonard Williams to the Giants in exchange for 2020 #3 pick and another conditional pick.  Williams trolls the Jets on the way out.
• Two wins are better than one: Giants; Buccaneers; Broncos; Browns.

No Gain

• Baker Mayfield fumbles latest post-game presser.
• Jamal Adams ongoing (trade deadline) melt down.
• Seahawks claim WR Josh Gordon.  If Bill Belichick doesn't want you, something is wrong with YOU.
• J.J. Watt is hurt ... again!

PUNT!

• Wishing Trent Williams a full recovery; the D.C. Snyders, not so much.
• Done for season: QB Joe Flacco (neck).
• Done for season: LB Kwon Alexander (torn pec).
• Go Bills ... New York's only real team!

WEEK NINE
Friday Line ~ NYDN

Jets -3 DOLPHINS
Man, is it going to stink at Miami where the NFL's two most offensively inept teams will go head-to-head in a Toilet Bowl of gastronomical proportions.  The Sea Mammals are averaging a league low 11-points per game.  The Jets come in at 11.1 points per game.  How compelling!  But whereas the Jets are actually trying to wins games and failing miserably, the Sea Mammals are trying to lose and doing a damn good job.  Miami is yielding upwards of 34-points a game.  But make no mistake, the Sea Mammals can't wait to inflict damage against their former coach.  I still give Gang Spleen the benefit of the doubt.  Jamal Adams will be playing angry.  That may work for or against him.  And expect a heavy, heavy dose of Le'Veon Bell.  Should Adam Gase and the Jets lose, the local media will descend upon them like flies on a cow patty.
Loss; 26-18 Dolphins

• ICYMI: The Bell Tolling For Le'Veon

Jaguars +1 1/2 Texans *London
Unlike the Texans, the London Jags have become quite accustomed to playing across the pond, with success I might add.  With J.J. Watt out for the season, Gardner freaking Minshew III gets to scan his sectors with a greater measure of safety and comfort.
Loss; 26-3 Texans

BILLS -9 1/2 D.C. Snyders
The Snyders should be thankful they have at least one win.  Ironically it came on the road.  They'll have no such luck this week with rookie QB Dwayne Haskins opposing Buffalo's defense.  If the Bills do not win by ten points it's because they stepped in their own droppings.
WIN; 24-9 Bills

Titans +3 1/2 PANTHERS
No knock against the (Jekyll and Hyde) Panthers, but Tennessee is starting to really grind it out.  Ball control keeps Kyle Allen and the Panthers offense off the field.
Loss; 30-20 Panthers

EAGLES -5 Bears
Two words: Mitch Trubisky.  He's not necessarily prone to throwing INT's, but has only five TD passes through six starts.  Chicago only managed 16 points last week against the Bolts.  I'm expecting the Eagles defensive front to swarm the pocket.  DeSean Jackson returns to full duty.
WIN; 22-14 Eagles

Vikings +2 CHIEFS
If I'm the Vikings, I'm insulted by this line.
Loss; 26-23 Chiefs

Colts -1 STEELERS
Colts are playing such balanced football.  They field one of the best offensive lines in the league.  Through seven starts Jacoby Brissertt has thrown 14 TDs and just four INTs.  Two weeks ago he threw for 326 yards with four TDs.  Meanwhile the Steelers lone two victories this season have come against the Sea Mammals and Bengals.
Loss; 26-24 Steelers

Lions +2 RAIDERS
The Lions have scored upwards of 30 points in three of the last four games, and put up 21 points against Green Bay.  It's their defense that sucks.  The Raiders are finally back at Oakland after spending four of the last five weeks on the road.  I'm thinking all their frequent flyer miles finally catch up with them.
Loss; 31-24 Raiders

SEAHAWKS -6 1/2 Bucs
Repeat after me: Russell Wilson versus Jameis Winston.  Chalk one up for the 12th man.
Loss; 40-35 Seahawks

Browns -3 BRONCOS
If any team needs a legitimate victory, it's the over hyped Browns.  Without Joe Flacco, the Broncos pose an easy opponent through which Cleveland may pull themselves together.
Loss; 24-19 Broncos

Packers -3 CHARGERS
If the Packers short circuit the Bolts, but no one in Los Angeles shows up to watch it, does it really happen?  Chargers lose by six!
Loss; 26-11 Chargers

Patriots -3 1/2 RAVENS
I'm dying to take the Ravens, and yes it has everything to do with the Patriots soft schedule.  The Ravens lost to the Chiefs and Browns, but are coming off their biggest win of the year against Seattle.  Then I snap out of it and remember what Bill Belichick does to young QBs like Lamar Jackson.
Loss; 37-20 Ravens

Cowboys -7 GIANTS *Monday Night
I'm not so sure about this one.  Dallas routs Eli Manning and the Giants by 18 points in week one.  Last week the Cowboys defeat the Eagles to halt a three game skid.  Daniel Jones for a change will be working with a full compliment of players, i.e., Sterling Shepard; Evan Engram; Darius Slayton; and Saquon Barkley.  Giants can easily keep this game within seven.  But if the Giants defense stays true to form the Cowboys cover.
WIN; 37-18 Cowboys

Schmear of the Week: (4-4)
Colts -1
LOSS

POST GAME
Week Nine Record: 3-10
Overall Record: 57-62
Schmear of the Week: 4-5
Bagels in the Basket: -6


Good luck, and have a Happy Football Sunday, everyone!